Prior Walter
Prior Walter, Louis’s boyfriend, a club designer/caterer was characterized by the play as a genuine and modest person. He had an eerie sense of humor and what had struck me most with my first encounter in the play was that he was weird and gullible. When he attended Louis’s grandmothers funeral, his comments were a bit creepy “cemetery fun. Don’t want to miss that (19)”. I was also taken aback to hear Prior say he wanted to get the rabbi’s number so he could bury him, who actually thinks of that. Whiles probably making fun of that he had no idea sickness and death were nearer that he had joked. Of all the characters in A Gay Fantasia on National Themes Angels in America, Prior was the most vulnerable from an emotional and physical sense. His relationship was vulnerable with Louis after he had realized he contracted the deadly disease AID’s. Even though others see his character as delusional, it was undeniable that he was true to himself. He faced the possibility of dying, being abandoned by his lover, feeling lonely and yet still defiant to want to live.
Prior evolved to become a ‘prophet’ from the earlier parts of the play but it was easy for followers not to take him serious. A prophet is someone who calls forth things before they happen. Besides his encounter with angles, Prior had exhibited some prophetic characteristics. He had predicted certain things at different stages in the play and they surely did come to pass. In Act 1 scene 8. After Prior had told his bizarre story to Louis of his ancestor who was a ship captain, he ironically was implying something else. Prior: “I think about that story a lot now. People in a boat, waiting, terrified, while implacable, unsmiling men, irresistibly strong, seize …. Maybe the person next to you, maybe you, and with no warning at all, with time only for a quick intake of air you are pitched into freezing, turbulent water and salt and darkness to drown. While time is running out I find myself drawn to anything that’s suspended, that lacks an ending (41, 42)”. He was implying his unpredictable ending as a person and his relationship to Louis. I am sure he had sensed what was about to happen. His interpretation of the people who were in the boat and the cold hearted crew terrified him at the same time signified his fears for the future. The fact that these people were made to believe they have been rescued and was going to make it and yet they were thrown back into the sea as the boat got crowed gave him a wake up call. He was for warning Louis of how he couldn’t trust him as a partner and knew he had the potential of betraying him at some point. He had felt insecure knowing that what he has could not exist in a moment. Eventually what he had predicted in relation to that story had happened in reality and it couldn’t be more prophetic than that.
Prior was marginalized in a lot of ways, as a gay man who had contracted a deadly disease AIDS, he was weak and demeaned and that made him a victim. I find it admirable to see prior beyond all the limitations he faced his spirit fought and finally rose above his plaque to evolve as a new character of heroism.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Friday, May 1, 2009
Allison’s Story And Why She Tells It
“I did begin, and start another one. When we were small, I could catch my sisters the way they caught butterflies, capture their attention and almost make them believe that all I said was true.” "Let me tell you a story" is her constant refrain that undoubtedly grabs attention. She is the mastermind of her stories and she weaves it the way she wants it. These stories evolve around her family history, her mother, aunts, sisters and cousins, women who lived in Greenville, South Carolina, the great grubby, the poor, and the grassroots. These were women who have been trapped by hard compromise, ground down until they no longer knew who they were, yet who survive and endure worth all their own. Allison's own story is here, too vivid, painful, and brutally honest. She told us about the women who ran away, all those legendary women who ran away. Was she one of those women? Maybe, but one thing she knows is that no one told her to take her world with her when running and that running eventually becomes a habit. According to her the secret of running is to know why you run and where you are going and leave behind the reason you are running.
Her stories were painful, candid, blunt and straight forward “let me tell you about what I have never been allowed to be. Beautiful and female.” Her story about the history of her family was death, murder, grief, denial, rage and ugliness. The women in her family were measured, manlike, sexless, bearers of babies, laden and scorned. She convinced herself of being unbreakable, an animal with an animal strength and not human at all “…that’s the lie I told myself for years (38).” In her mind the women she loved most in the world horrified her.
However, these were the stories she told and behind them were the stories she doesn’t tell; yet wished she could make her readers hear (39).
These stories were terrifying, kept as a secret, shameful and fearful to tell. “The man raped me, it’s the truth. It’s fact. I was five, and he was eight months married to my mother.” Her step dad raped Allison as child and it took her years to get past the rage, anger, grief of saying words like ‘rape’ and ‘child’. Sadly enough not only did she suffer from sexual abuse but domestic violence as well. She had described her stepfather as a man who wasn’t sure he liked women but was sure he didn’t like smart, tomboys and stubborn little girls who were not afraid of him. She resented this man, a man who had walked across her childhood and the life she had made for herself. Allison continues to tell her story until she brought readers to the point of relief when she finally gathered the courage to say NO to this man for all the abuse (47).
Allison in “Two Or Three Things I Know For Sure” is a voice for people who can’t tell their story, she told other people’s story for them. Her story about her sexuality was intensely told without a trace of fiction. She confesses her meaning of love as a mystery, calamity and a curse that skipped her. One the other hand, sex to her was a country she been dragged into as an unwilling girl and madness of the body. “ For all that it could terrify and confuse me, sex was something I had assimilated. Sex was a game or a weapon or an addiction. Sex was familiar. But love …. was another country (55).” She became a lesbian because of her commitment to a women’s revolution. Her feminist movement was attractive to a lot of women. According to her most women lose their lives not knowing they can do something different.
What makes Allison’s story fascinating is that she can make an ordinary moment inspirational and more so pragmatic that most readers could almost identify themselves with. Her story telling becomes healing, a survival tool for mending the heart, offers strength and prepares you for the worst. She tells stories to prove she was meant to survive “My stories are no parables, no Reader’s Digest unforgettable characters, no women’s movement polemics.. I am not here to make anyone happy. What am here for is to claim my life, my mama’s death, our losses and our triumphs, to name them for myself. I am here to claim everything I know, and there are only two or three things I know for sure (51,52).”
“I did begin, and start another one. When we were small, I could catch my sisters the way they caught butterflies, capture their attention and almost make them believe that all I said was true.” "Let me tell you a story" is her constant refrain that undoubtedly grabs attention. She is the mastermind of her stories and she weaves it the way she wants it. These stories evolve around her family history, her mother, aunts, sisters and cousins, women who lived in Greenville, South Carolina, the great grubby, the poor, and the grassroots. These were women who have been trapped by hard compromise, ground down until they no longer knew who they were, yet who survive and endure worth all their own. Allison's own story is here, too vivid, painful, and brutally honest. She told us about the women who ran away, all those legendary women who ran away. Was she one of those women? Maybe, but one thing she knows is that no one told her to take her world with her when running and that running eventually becomes a habit. According to her the secret of running is to know why you run and where you are going and leave behind the reason you are running.
Her stories were painful, candid, blunt and straight forward “let me tell you about what I have never been allowed to be. Beautiful and female.” Her story about the history of her family was death, murder, grief, denial, rage and ugliness. The women in her family were measured, manlike, sexless, bearers of babies, laden and scorned. She convinced herself of being unbreakable, an animal with an animal strength and not human at all “…that’s the lie I told myself for years (38).” In her mind the women she loved most in the world horrified her.
However, these were the stories she told and behind them were the stories she doesn’t tell; yet wished she could make her readers hear (39).
These stories were terrifying, kept as a secret, shameful and fearful to tell. “The man raped me, it’s the truth. It’s fact. I was five, and he was eight months married to my mother.” Her step dad raped Allison as child and it took her years to get past the rage, anger, grief of saying words like ‘rape’ and ‘child’. Sadly enough not only did she suffer from sexual abuse but domestic violence as well. She had described her stepfather as a man who wasn’t sure he liked women but was sure he didn’t like smart, tomboys and stubborn little girls who were not afraid of him. She resented this man, a man who had walked across her childhood and the life she had made for herself. Allison continues to tell her story until she brought readers to the point of relief when she finally gathered the courage to say NO to this man for all the abuse (47).
Allison in “Two Or Three Things I Know For Sure” is a voice for people who can’t tell their story, she told other people’s story for them. Her story about her sexuality was intensely told without a trace of fiction. She confesses her meaning of love as a mystery, calamity and a curse that skipped her. One the other hand, sex to her was a country she been dragged into as an unwilling girl and madness of the body. “ For all that it could terrify and confuse me, sex was something I had assimilated. Sex was a game or a weapon or an addiction. Sex was familiar. But love …. was another country (55).” She became a lesbian because of her commitment to a women’s revolution. Her feminist movement was attractive to a lot of women. According to her most women lose their lives not knowing they can do something different.
What makes Allison’s story fascinating is that she can make an ordinary moment inspirational and more so pragmatic that most readers could almost identify themselves with. Her story telling becomes healing, a survival tool for mending the heart, offers strength and prepares you for the worst. She tells stories to prove she was meant to survive “My stories are no parables, no Reader’s Digest unforgettable characters, no women’s movement polemics.. I am not here to make anyone happy. What am here for is to claim my life, my mama’s death, our losses and our triumphs, to name them for myself. I am here to claim everything I know, and there are only two or three things I know for sure (51,52).”
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
The Fight Towards Completeness
The Fight Towards Completeness
“Before the presentation, when I sat across from my boss, telling him where in the script each slide cues and when I wanted to run the video segment, my boss says, what do you get yourself into every weekend?” In Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk, the first rule about fight club is that you don’t talk about fight club. The purpose of Fight club was to help this generation of men raised by women reconnect to their manhood. Even though they enjoyed being part of this club they did run it like a cult. It gave them a sense of belongingness and yet they treated it with separate identity where they did rather draw a line between who they were in real life compared to who they were in fight club, “fight club exist only in the hours between when fight club starts and when fight club ends (49).” It was a fake world they had created for themselves “who guys are in fight club is not who they are in the real world, who I am in fight club is not someone my boss knows (49). As Palahniuk described the graphics of the so called fight club, I crunched because to me it was more pain than one could have experienced but to them it was the kind of pain that healed, the pain to fight for.
The stigma attached to these men raised by women didn’t make them feel men enough and as a result, they were unable to connect with their manhood. They were often quick to point out to the fact that they lacked father figures in their lives. Members of this club had similar needs, they struggled internally with their identities of being men and therefore being part of fight club gave them a chance to come face to face with their fears and fight it off. The writer compared the feeling of satisfaction of fight club, to things like going to the gym, keeping your hair cut short and cutting your nails, in other words these were some of the things that makes one feel good about themselves. The writer valued going to fight club more than going to a crowded gym with guys trying to look like men. As he continuously struggled with his identity he wasn’t sure whether his searches for answers were self-improvement or maybe self-destruction (49). His brief encounter with his absent father didn’t offer any answers either. Whiles still confused at age 30, he had turned to his father for directions, but not knowing what his son needed, he pointed him towards getting married. To him another woman is not the answer to fill his void (51).
Fight club offered an opportunity for these men to confront their demons and also gave them a sense of accomplishment. However the discovery of the connection between finding their identities and self-destruction after Tyler asked to hit him, to them was a great way to be whole. They believed that the possibility of destroying some part of themselves may be the answer to their quest. According to Tyler he didn’t want to die without scars which symbolizes their readiness to battle their fears and what they had lost growing up. In the writer’s opinion he just didn’t want to die without few scars, “It’s nothing anymore to have a beautiful stock body (48).” As they continued to fight and suffer the bruises and scars, the writer’s sense of vainness began to diminish. For someone who is defined by the perishable things in life I could see a change of tone, “At the time, my life just seemed too complete, and maybe we have to break everything to make something better out of ourselves (52).” Even though they claim nothing personal about who they physically will fight, there is everything personal about fighting their confused and split personalities. Nonetheless in search of their identities, the inner struggles grew with them; they were torn between who they are and who they want to be. At some point they felt their lives could have been much better with their fathers involved and another point they felt they probably didn’t need them as Tyler recalls “…. Maybe we didn’t need a father to complete ourselves (54).”
“Before the presentation, when I sat across from my boss, telling him where in the script each slide cues and when I wanted to run the video segment, my boss says, what do you get yourself into every weekend?” In Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk, the first rule about fight club is that you don’t talk about fight club. The purpose of Fight club was to help this generation of men raised by women reconnect to their manhood. Even though they enjoyed being part of this club they did run it like a cult. It gave them a sense of belongingness and yet they treated it with separate identity where they did rather draw a line between who they were in real life compared to who they were in fight club, “fight club exist only in the hours between when fight club starts and when fight club ends (49).” It was a fake world they had created for themselves “who guys are in fight club is not who they are in the real world, who I am in fight club is not someone my boss knows (49). As Palahniuk described the graphics of the so called fight club, I crunched because to me it was more pain than one could have experienced but to them it was the kind of pain that healed, the pain to fight for.
The stigma attached to these men raised by women didn’t make them feel men enough and as a result, they were unable to connect with their manhood. They were often quick to point out to the fact that they lacked father figures in their lives. Members of this club had similar needs, they struggled internally with their identities of being men and therefore being part of fight club gave them a chance to come face to face with their fears and fight it off. The writer compared the feeling of satisfaction of fight club, to things like going to the gym, keeping your hair cut short and cutting your nails, in other words these were some of the things that makes one feel good about themselves. The writer valued going to fight club more than going to a crowded gym with guys trying to look like men. As he continuously struggled with his identity he wasn’t sure whether his searches for answers were self-improvement or maybe self-destruction (49). His brief encounter with his absent father didn’t offer any answers either. Whiles still confused at age 30, he had turned to his father for directions, but not knowing what his son needed, he pointed him towards getting married. To him another woman is not the answer to fill his void (51).
Fight club offered an opportunity for these men to confront their demons and also gave them a sense of accomplishment. However the discovery of the connection between finding their identities and self-destruction after Tyler asked to hit him, to them was a great way to be whole. They believed that the possibility of destroying some part of themselves may be the answer to their quest. According to Tyler he didn’t want to die without scars which symbolizes their readiness to battle their fears and what they had lost growing up. In the writer’s opinion he just didn’t want to die without few scars, “It’s nothing anymore to have a beautiful stock body (48).” As they continued to fight and suffer the bruises and scars, the writer’s sense of vainness began to diminish. For someone who is defined by the perishable things in life I could see a change of tone, “At the time, my life just seemed too complete, and maybe we have to break everything to make something better out of ourselves (52).” Even though they claim nothing personal about who they physically will fight, there is everything personal about fighting their confused and split personalities. Nonetheless in search of their identities, the inner struggles grew with them; they were torn between who they are and who they want to be. At some point they felt their lives could have been much better with their fathers involved and another point they felt they probably didn’t need them as Tyler recalls “…. Maybe we didn’t need a father to complete ourselves (54).”
Monday, April 6, 2009
The Significance of Four Women in Tayo’s Life
In Ceremony, Silko explores the gender roles of women and among them were four women characters that played significant roles to the development and actualization of Tayo’s character. They were Tayo’s birth mother, Auntie, old Grandma, and Ts’eh (a Montano). Because Tayo is of mixed ancestry, half white and half Native American, Tayo discovers he has a “natural” cultural flaw imposed upon him at birth, which would linger and expand into adulthood. His lifelong desperation to belong in his family and his community exposed his vulnerabilities as an adult and a veteran who had returned from World War II. His mother left him when he was four years old and that began his sense of emptiness and abandonment. Due to the alcohol addiction and vicarious life-style of his mum he was left with his auntie, Josiah and Grandmother to raise him. “He didn’t remember much: only that she had come after dark and wrapped him in a man’s coat - it smelled like a man - and that there were men in the car with them . . . he clung to her because when she left him, he knew she would be gone for a long time (60). As she kissed him on the forehead and pushed him into Josiah’s arms, he cried because he knew she wasn’t coming back for him this time (61).
Auntie eventually raised Tayo and became the mother figure he lacked; however, Auntie reluctantly accepted this responsibility because she felt responsible to the community for the disgrace Tayo’s mum had brought to the family. Auntie was a devoted Christian who thrived on a narrow interpretation of the concept of martyrdom. In Auntie's understanding of martyrdom, she will gain the respect of her peers if she is seen to suffer for the sins of others. It is in this spirit that she raises Tayo, rather than out of any love for him. She was hesitant toward Tayo as he was not her real son and was also a “half-breed.” For Tayo, this only added to his feeling of displacement and the feeling of being invisible. Auntie would give her affection and attention to her natural son Rocky, and would intentionally make Tayo feel excluded. However when Josiah, old Grandma or Robert was there, she pretended to treat him the same as she treated Rocky. Since Rocky had been killed at combat and Josiah had passed, Tayo found himself in auntie’s hands again as she nurses him after he had returned home from war; he was all she had left (29), yet to Tayo she was just someone who looked after him.
Unlike Auntie, old Grandma, does accept Tayo as her own blood and wants only the best for him. For instance, when Grandma suggested, “that boy needs a medicine man. Otherwise, he will have to go away,” Auntie retaliated with “Oh, I don’t know, Mama. You know how they are. You know what people will say if we ask for a medicine man to help him. Someone will say it’s not right. They’ll say, ‘don’t do it. He’s not full blood anyway (30).” However, Grandma did not hesitate to let auntie know that regardless of what people thought of him, she loved him “he’s my grandson, If I send for old Ku’oosh, he’ll come. Let them talk if they want to (33).” In other words, Grandma was more concerned about the health and well being of her grandson rather than the gossip of the other tribesmen. The love and compassion demonstrated by old Grandma allowed Tayo to experience some feeling of belongingness, however not enough to make Tayo feel whole.
It is when Tayo meets and falls in love with Ts’eh, a mystical character that appears and disappears in various parts of the novel, that he completes his healing journey. The significance of Ts’eh to Ceremony is very powerful and vital to the recovery of Tayo. She lives up in the rim rock and is in tune with the land and her surroundings. Being torn between the white world and the Indian world and the unfortunate circumstances of his upbringing, Tayo lives feeling invisible and hollow inside. Ts’eh helps him to become in touch with his Indian side and to feel strength and power from the land. She teaches him the importance of certain plants, flowers, and ceremonies and how they are significant to Native American culture and survival (208). Thus, after falling deeply in love with her, Tayo begins to feel alive again.
Ceremony by Silko presented Tayo as he struggled to gain psychological wholeness in the face of various traumatic experiences, ranging from a troubled childhood to cultural marginalization and combat experiences during World War II. The novel unfolded as Tayo’s psychological recovery leads him to his rediscovery of Native American cultural practices.
In Ceremony, Silko explores the gender roles of women and among them were four women characters that played significant roles to the development and actualization of Tayo’s character. They were Tayo’s birth mother, Auntie, old Grandma, and Ts’eh (a Montano). Because Tayo is of mixed ancestry, half white and half Native American, Tayo discovers he has a “natural” cultural flaw imposed upon him at birth, which would linger and expand into adulthood. His lifelong desperation to belong in his family and his community exposed his vulnerabilities as an adult and a veteran who had returned from World War II. His mother left him when he was four years old and that began his sense of emptiness and abandonment. Due to the alcohol addiction and vicarious life-style of his mum he was left with his auntie, Josiah and Grandmother to raise him. “He didn’t remember much: only that she had come after dark and wrapped him in a man’s coat - it smelled like a man - and that there were men in the car with them . . . he clung to her because when she left him, he knew she would be gone for a long time (60). As she kissed him on the forehead and pushed him into Josiah’s arms, he cried because he knew she wasn’t coming back for him this time (61).
Auntie eventually raised Tayo and became the mother figure he lacked; however, Auntie reluctantly accepted this responsibility because she felt responsible to the community for the disgrace Tayo’s mum had brought to the family. Auntie was a devoted Christian who thrived on a narrow interpretation of the concept of martyrdom. In Auntie's understanding of martyrdom, she will gain the respect of her peers if she is seen to suffer for the sins of others. It is in this spirit that she raises Tayo, rather than out of any love for him. She was hesitant toward Tayo as he was not her real son and was also a “half-breed.” For Tayo, this only added to his feeling of displacement and the feeling of being invisible. Auntie would give her affection and attention to her natural son Rocky, and would intentionally make Tayo feel excluded. However when Josiah, old Grandma or Robert was there, she pretended to treat him the same as she treated Rocky. Since Rocky had been killed at combat and Josiah had passed, Tayo found himself in auntie’s hands again as she nurses him after he had returned home from war; he was all she had left (29), yet to Tayo she was just someone who looked after him.
Unlike Auntie, old Grandma, does accept Tayo as her own blood and wants only the best for him. For instance, when Grandma suggested, “that boy needs a medicine man. Otherwise, he will have to go away,” Auntie retaliated with “Oh, I don’t know, Mama. You know how they are. You know what people will say if we ask for a medicine man to help him. Someone will say it’s not right. They’ll say, ‘don’t do it. He’s not full blood anyway (30).” However, Grandma did not hesitate to let auntie know that regardless of what people thought of him, she loved him “he’s my grandson, If I send for old Ku’oosh, he’ll come. Let them talk if they want to (33).” In other words, Grandma was more concerned about the health and well being of her grandson rather than the gossip of the other tribesmen. The love and compassion demonstrated by old Grandma allowed Tayo to experience some feeling of belongingness, however not enough to make Tayo feel whole.
It is when Tayo meets and falls in love with Ts’eh, a mystical character that appears and disappears in various parts of the novel, that he completes his healing journey. The significance of Ts’eh to Ceremony is very powerful and vital to the recovery of Tayo. She lives up in the rim rock and is in tune with the land and her surroundings. Being torn between the white world and the Indian world and the unfortunate circumstances of his upbringing, Tayo lives feeling invisible and hollow inside. Ts’eh helps him to become in touch with his Indian side and to feel strength and power from the land. She teaches him the importance of certain plants, flowers, and ceremonies and how they are significant to Native American culture and survival (208). Thus, after falling deeply in love with her, Tayo begins to feel alive again.
Ceremony by Silko presented Tayo as he struggled to gain psychological wholeness in the face of various traumatic experiences, ranging from a troubled childhood to cultural marginalization and combat experiences during World War II. The novel unfolded as Tayo’s psychological recovery leads him to his rediscovery of Native American cultural practices.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Barbara’s letter to Perry as Capote presented it
Barbara’s letter as presented by Capote In Cold Blood was one of the pieces that struck me (138). It was a mixture of emotions of jealousy, resentment, sarcasm, irony and at the same time truthful. She started off apologizing for not writing back sooner and then talked about her family (Donnie, Baby and Freddie). She then hinted that her letter was going to be long. My expectations were different from the harsh reality I discovered as I read further. Obviously she mentioned how they seem to be coping with the incidents with Jimmy, Fern and also praising mum and dad for passing on their artistic flair. She then took a more serious tone addressing Perry’s actions. Barbara admitted that even though their environment played a role in their growing up, she felt grateful for those experiences. She pointed out that she wasn’t too pleased with Perry’s actions, which had eventually ended him in prison. She was also aware that her criticism to him was going to result in resentment and actually thought of what could possibly happen “Not to hear from you at all or a letter telling me exactly what you think of me.”
On the other hand one can not deny the fact that Barbara loved Perry dearly but was angry at him at the same time, and that was the driving force of this passionate letter. Again she wanted Perry to know about her feelings towards him and also to see things from someone’s point of view. What made it hit home for me wasn’t the fact that she was blatant about what she wanted to convey but she carried it not from an arrogant point of view. She often admitted her faults and weaknesses as human and in the same way she urged Perry that he should take full responsibility of his actions (140) paragraph 8 and shouldn’t blame his dad for any wrong doing. Perry’s inabilities to show signs of sincere regret and lack of respect for laws embarrassed her deeply. However as Capote narrated, Barbara’s letter complimented Perry’s intelligence and excellent vocabulary skills. I am sure that made him feel good and his ego boosted because I assumed he was ticked off a bit having read the letter to that point.
Nonetheless Barbara continued and this time introduced the issue with his dad, which is a very sensitive issue for Perry because he had a sticky relationship with him. As age caught up with dad his health also took a downturn but Perry’s actions continued to hurt him the most. Barbara continued to stress that Perry owed his dad respect and common decency as if just bringing the issue of his dad wasn’t enough. Interestingly Capote presented Barbara as she struggles with her own emotions and the whole issue. Barbara showed signs of envy, bitterness, not loved and felt neglected by her father “….you are the only one dad loves, in short his family” (142). She believed that her dad loved Perry more than he had loved her.
Finally she apologized for coming off so strong on Perry that she felt the letter could be censored by the prison authorities as well as detrimental to his release. I felt a blow when she even continued to dish it out more to Perry by comparing him to an animal if he continued to live his life without feeling compassion for his fellow-man. She ended her letter with some strong words challenging him and reminding him that he is the only person responsible for his actions and therefore had the choice to overcome his weakness.
Barbara’s letter as presented by Capote In Cold Blood was one of the pieces that struck me (138). It was a mixture of emotions of jealousy, resentment, sarcasm, irony and at the same time truthful. She started off apologizing for not writing back sooner and then talked about her family (Donnie, Baby and Freddie). She then hinted that her letter was going to be long. My expectations were different from the harsh reality I discovered as I read further. Obviously she mentioned how they seem to be coping with the incidents with Jimmy, Fern and also praising mum and dad for passing on their artistic flair. She then took a more serious tone addressing Perry’s actions. Barbara admitted that even though their environment played a role in their growing up, she felt grateful for those experiences. She pointed out that she wasn’t too pleased with Perry’s actions, which had eventually ended him in prison. She was also aware that her criticism to him was going to result in resentment and actually thought of what could possibly happen “Not to hear from you at all or a letter telling me exactly what you think of me.”
On the other hand one can not deny the fact that Barbara loved Perry dearly but was angry at him at the same time, and that was the driving force of this passionate letter. Again she wanted Perry to know about her feelings towards him and also to see things from someone’s point of view. What made it hit home for me wasn’t the fact that she was blatant about what she wanted to convey but she carried it not from an arrogant point of view. She often admitted her faults and weaknesses as human and in the same way she urged Perry that he should take full responsibility of his actions (140) paragraph 8 and shouldn’t blame his dad for any wrong doing. Perry’s inabilities to show signs of sincere regret and lack of respect for laws embarrassed her deeply. However as Capote narrated, Barbara’s letter complimented Perry’s intelligence and excellent vocabulary skills. I am sure that made him feel good and his ego boosted because I assumed he was ticked off a bit having read the letter to that point.
Nonetheless Barbara continued and this time introduced the issue with his dad, which is a very sensitive issue for Perry because he had a sticky relationship with him. As age caught up with dad his health also took a downturn but Perry’s actions continued to hurt him the most. Barbara continued to stress that Perry owed his dad respect and common decency as if just bringing the issue of his dad wasn’t enough. Interestingly Capote presented Barbara as she struggles with her own emotions and the whole issue. Barbara showed signs of envy, bitterness, not loved and felt neglected by her father “….you are the only one dad loves, in short his family” (142). She believed that her dad loved Perry more than he had loved her.
Finally she apologized for coming off so strong on Perry that she felt the letter could be censored by the prison authorities as well as detrimental to his release. I felt a blow when she even continued to dish it out more to Perry by comparing him to an animal if he continued to live his life without feeling compassion for his fellow-man. She ended her letter with some strong words challenging him and reminding him that he is the only person responsible for his actions and therefore had the choice to overcome his weakness.
Friday, March 6, 2009
Barbara’s letter to Perry as Capote presented it
Barbara’s letter as presented by Capote In Cold Blood was one of the pieces that struck me. It was a mixture of emotions of jealousy, resentment, sarcasm, irony and at the same time truthful. She started off apologizing for not writing back sooner and then talked about her family (Donnie, Baby and Freddie). She then hinted that her letter was going to be long. My expectations were different from the harsh reality I discovered as I read further. Obviously she mentioned how they seem to be coping with the incidences with Jimmy, Fern and also praising mum and dad for passing on their artistic flair. She then took a more serious tone addressing Perry’s actions. Barbara admitted that even though their environment played a role in their growing up, she felt grateful for those experiences. She pointed out that she wasn’t too pleased with Perry’s actions, which had eventually ended him in prison. She was also aware that her criticism to him was going to result in resentment and actually thought of what could possibly happen “Not to hear from you at all or a letter telling me exactly what you think of me”.
On the other hand one can not deny the fact that Barbara loved Perry dearly but was angry at him at the same time, and that was the driving force of this passionate letter. Again she wanted Perry to know about her feelings towards him and also to see things from someone else point of view. What made it hit home for me wasn’t the fact that she was blatant about what she wanted to convey but she carried it not from an arrogant point of view. She often admitted her faults and weaknesses as human and in the same way she urged Perry to take full responsibility of his actions (p. 140, paragraph 8) and shouldn’t blame his dad for any wrong doings. Perry’s inabilities to show signs of sincere regret and lack of respect for laws embarrassed her deeply. However as Capote narrated, Barbara’s letter complimented Perry’s intelligence and excellent vocabulary skills. I am sure that made him feel good and his ego boosted because I assumed he was ticked off a bit having read the letter to that point.
Nonetheless Barbara continued and this time introduced the issue with his dad, which was a very sensitive issue for Perry because he had a sticky relationship with him. As age catches up with dad his health also took a down turn but Perry’s actions continued to hurt him the most. Barbara continued to stress that Perry owed Dad respect and common decency as if just bringing the issue of dad wasn’t enough. Interestingly Capote presented Barbara as she struggled with her own emotions and the whole issue. She showed neglect, not loved, envy and bitterness from the fact her dad loved Perry more than her “….you are the only one dad loves, in short his family” (p.142).
Finally she apologized for coming off so strong on Perry that she felt the letter could be censored by the prison authorities as well as detrimental to his release. I felt a blow when she even continued to dish it out more to Perry by comparing him to an animal if he continued to live his life without feeling compassion for his fellow-man. She ended her letter with some strong words challenging him and reminding him that he is the only person responsible for his actions and therefore had the choice to overcome his weakness. Wow what a letter! Would you think Barbara was fair in her letter to Perry?
Barbara’s letter as presented by Capote In Cold Blood was one of the pieces that struck me. It was a mixture of emotions of jealousy, resentment, sarcasm, irony and at the same time truthful. She started off apologizing for not writing back sooner and then talked about her family (Donnie, Baby and Freddie). She then hinted that her letter was going to be long. My expectations were different from the harsh reality I discovered as I read further. Obviously she mentioned how they seem to be coping with the incidences with Jimmy, Fern and also praising mum and dad for passing on their artistic flair. She then took a more serious tone addressing Perry’s actions. Barbara admitted that even though their environment played a role in their growing up, she felt grateful for those experiences. She pointed out that she wasn’t too pleased with Perry’s actions, which had eventually ended him in prison. She was also aware that her criticism to him was going to result in resentment and actually thought of what could possibly happen “Not to hear from you at all or a letter telling me exactly what you think of me”.
On the other hand one can not deny the fact that Barbara loved Perry dearly but was angry at him at the same time, and that was the driving force of this passionate letter. Again she wanted Perry to know about her feelings towards him and also to see things from someone else point of view. What made it hit home for me wasn’t the fact that she was blatant about what she wanted to convey but she carried it not from an arrogant point of view. She often admitted her faults and weaknesses as human and in the same way she urged Perry to take full responsibility of his actions (p. 140, paragraph 8) and shouldn’t blame his dad for any wrong doings. Perry’s inabilities to show signs of sincere regret and lack of respect for laws embarrassed her deeply. However as Capote narrated, Barbara’s letter complimented Perry’s intelligence and excellent vocabulary skills. I am sure that made him feel good and his ego boosted because I assumed he was ticked off a bit having read the letter to that point.
Nonetheless Barbara continued and this time introduced the issue with his dad, which was a very sensitive issue for Perry because he had a sticky relationship with him. As age catches up with dad his health also took a down turn but Perry’s actions continued to hurt him the most. Barbara continued to stress that Perry owed Dad respect and common decency as if just bringing the issue of dad wasn’t enough. Interestingly Capote presented Barbara as she struggled with her own emotions and the whole issue. She showed neglect, not loved, envy and bitterness from the fact her dad loved Perry more than her “….you are the only one dad loves, in short his family” (p.142).
Finally she apologized for coming off so strong on Perry that she felt the letter could be censored by the prison authorities as well as detrimental to his release. I felt a blow when she even continued to dish it out more to Perry by comparing him to an animal if he continued to live his life without feeling compassion for his fellow-man. She ended her letter with some strong words challenging him and reminding him that he is the only person responsible for his actions and therefore had the choice to overcome his weakness. Wow what a letter! Would you think Barbara was fair in her letter to Perry?
Monday, March 2, 2009
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